No Fun

Do you remember when writing a blog was fun? I do. I used to look forward to it chomping at the proverbial bit until some earth shattering idea crossed my feeble brain and I could begin stroking the keys in a way that would make Chopin jealous. Then came day two. Ideas were few and far between. The ideas I had were sophomoric and junior. I was sucked into a dirty hole in a men’s bathroom filled with masturbation and cat jokes. Yet, somehow, I persevered. This blog currently has one hundred and forty-seven some odd posts. All original content that I stole. I’m very proud that I’ve maintained something so long (i.e. continued to pay for hosting). What’s surprising is how sporadic the posts are and how scattered my thoughts are. While I may have persevered, I have barely put together anything meaningful. Scattered and irregular, I’ve realized that above all things, I am a flake. I’ve avoided tasks with procrastination. I’ve missed opportunities by ducking out of the hard work. I find it to be an embarrassing attribute. People like me but they don’t trust me. I’m beginning to see that being a flake is taking me to a place I don’t want to go. I’m missing challenges. I’m missing opportunities. I’m missing life and I’m missing fun. I’ve decided that I am going to correct my flaky behavior. For the past three months, I’ve heeded the motto “think it, do it”. If I have to do something, I do it the moment I think it. It is changing my behavior. I’m more responsible for my actions. I’m beginning to take on challenges and grow. My next step is to take this blog to new places. Fun places that are fun and just, overall, fun. That’s something to be proud of.